Sunday, June 7, 2015

A Different Indulgence

I shut my eyes, trying to pull out the right words from my vocabulary closet, but each shelf just seemed short of stock. We were given ten minutes to write a headline, and eight minutes through, my broken paragraphs were riddled with strikethroughs and arrows.

My thoughts kept jumping from my unfinished paragraph, to the exercise instructions, to the tips given in the past 5 hours, then back to the messy Cattleya sheet in front of me. Before I knew it, the ten minutes was up. I fell victim to the all-too-common compulsion to overly self-edit.

I felt pretty bad to not finish, mainly because I wanted to subject myself to the critique of the workshop facilitators. But as several classmates read their headlines to the crowd, the pointers I picked up proved equally applicable to my own mistakes.

Such as creating the distinction between merely describing a series of activities versus really lighting up a vivid image in the reader’s mind. Using short, punchy sentences to make a clear and striking statement (ouch, this one really hit me). And always challenging yourself with the question, “WTF should I read your article?”

These, among many other lessons, were what I took home from the Travel Writing Workshop by Writer’s Block Philippines. Theirs was one of the top results when I Googled for writing workshops in Manila, and one month later, I am a proud recipient of a certificate. More than that, I left the auditorium carrying a bundle of inspiration to just keep writing and – who knows – maybe make a decent career out of it! (Guys, they say dream big, diba?!)

Dreaming big starts here!

Being QC-born and bred, my life revolves around this retracted national capital. Then ever since I started working in Quezon City, and later on, my husband as well, I had fewer reasons to brave EDSA and C5. I tended to coast within my comfort zone, which is, ironically, the “killer highway” that is Commonwealth Avenue.

But this particular Saturday, a fellow QC-buddy obliged me on my invitation to cross cities for an afternoon of learning how to write. Being the QC-girls that we were, we wanted to maximize our “road trip” to The Fort and decided to drive out earlier. The workshop wasn't scheduled until 1pm, so our day began at 10am by checking out the street art put up as part of The Bonifacio Arts Foundation’s (BAFI) ONE Festival.

Now I hardly know anything about street art. But I suppose that’s why initiatives like these are so important. How else are we to know that such a scene even exists if these works are not put in highly-visible places? How can we appreciate all the hard work that is put into creating these murals, if we only see them in pictures? Because it was one thing to see them on my social media feeds, and another to really stand in front of them and take in the details. The sheer size of some of them is enough to blow you away.

Artwork by Nate Frizzell (1 of 3).  His real-life looking characters are located on the walls of  the High Street shops, this one beside the glass window of ROX.

Artwork by AKA Corleone.  His bold and bright images surely bring life to this dead 28th Avenue parking lot wall (near Muji).

Artwork by FAILE. Their huge collage of mass culture icons can be found on the wall of One Global Place building, corner of 5th and 26th Avenues.

Artwork by Cyrcle. That's me running to take my picture under this huge, intricate man from outer space, at the wall of Icon Plaza building, corner of 7th and 26th Avenues.

I laud BAFI for this effort. It may take a while before public art becomes a priority of land property developers, but through baby steps like these, I do hope more Filipinos gain an appreciation for it, so that more street artists are given proper credit for what they do.

So did I mention that it was a day-long field trip? After my friend and I drenched ourselves in sweat on the sidewalks of BGC, we had our lunch and travel writing workshop, which ended at 6pm. The last stop for the day was at Christ’s Commission Fellowship (CCF) Frontera Verde, Pasig City, where we sat in on an Apologetics discussion group.

To those not familiar, Apologetics is a branch of Christianity that deals with defending the faith through a more rational manner, usually through historical evidence and philosophical arguments. The “life verse” – or the go-to verse for inspiration and direction – of CCF’s Apologetics group is 1 Peter 3:15 from the Holy Bible which reads,
"But sanctify Christ as Lord in your hearts, always being ready to make a defense to everyone who asks you to give an account for the hope that is in you, yet with gentleness and reverence."
That evening, the group was on the topic of church abuse. They discussed possible ways to defend Christianity against the criticism it has on abuses that happen within the community, or how to react to a person who has lost trust in the faith due to church-related abuses.

What I found most reasonable out of all the opinions thrown around is the position that we must always look to the character of Jesus Christ. If a person claims to be of supposedly-solid Christian faith, particularly church leaders, but does not act in accordance with Jesus Christ’s character, then the error is not in Jesus Christ or the Christian faith, but in how that person follows (or rather, fails to follow) the faith.

We cannot expect a man, even if he is a prominent figure in the church, to fully represent or to be an embodiment of the all-perfect Jesus Christ, because he is only man. And man is of sinful nature (Romans 3:23 NIV: for all have sinned and fall short of the glory of God), with tendencies to falter.

A person who abuses is not doing a sinful act because s/he is a Christian. He does it because s/he is a sinful person, as all of us are.

In a more practical illustration, we cannot expect one man to represent an entire church. I would look at it, simply, as never generalizing one man to exactly represent the thoughts and beliefs of all the members of whatever organization s/he belongs to.

Needless to say, there are a lot more nuances to this heavy topic. But a few hours of actually discussing it was enough to shed a little light and provoke other suspicions, and that always gives doubts a better chance of being addressed, than not being discussed at all.

At the end of the day, I realized that that was what our field trip was all about. What started out as a simple agreement to rouse our interest in travel writing ended up as a day-long indulgence on things that stirred and challenged our curious brains.

The result is a memorable day of pop culture and literature, of Instagramming and jotting notes (just like we were back in college!), and of expanding our circle of comfort a wee bit bigger.

I think that makes the trip outside of QC worth it.

Monday, May 4, 2015

Falling for Jane the Virgin

It's been too long since I've written here. Never seemed to find that perfect intersection of "NON-WORK/CLIMBING TIME" and "INSPIRATION". Sure, sometimes, admittedly, there IS time...but it's impossible to push words out when it's the inspiration that's lacking, right? ;)

Fast forward to today and we recently discovered Jane the Virgin. Okay, disclaimer: If you're not into over-analyzing and prying into a girls' brain as she makes sense of life out of a telenovela-type TV show, then stop reading right now.




But Jane entered our lives unexpectedly. Those who know me know that I hardly watch TV. We have a TV in our bedroom that I clumsily operate on a very occasional basis. When Miel is out of town, the TV never goes on. The last time I touched the remote control was over a month ago because I wanted to listen to music, and streaming a YouTube video on it was my only way of getting on-demand music (I'm no Spotify Premium user).

Ah, back to Jane. So it's a sitcom that apparently started airing in the US about a year ago, and we got our hands on the first eight episodes. I won't get into too much detail about the show because that can be easily researched, but what one needs to know is the premise of how Jane is this Latina daughter of a single mom who had her life setup "according to plan". She was perfectly on track in her life, about to finish with college (with a very-practical teaching degree) and with a boyfriend who loves her (and they were going towards the next steps of engagement > marriage > family), UNTIL she was accidentally inseminated with a rich (hot) guy's sample, thus making her a pregnant virgin. So the premise is pretty telling of how ridiculously funny some parts of the show can be (come on, accidentally, artificially inseminated?!)

Maybe it's how light-hearted the show is. Maybe it's how adorable the rich (hot) guy is. Maybe I'm relating to Jane's passion for writing which I (somehow, sometimes) have and never pursued. Maybe all the pregnancy worries makes me reflect about my own decisions of having a baby. Maybe I'm overwhelmed with "real-world" problems and the show's a perfect break off it.

Maybe -- and most likely -- it's just the typical effect of TV shows where I enjoy living vicariously through the characters, knowing that I'll never have that kind of life, yet still trying to draw inspiration and lessons from what they're experiencing...YES...while being fully aware that I'm trying to learn from people in a TV show even though I'm in the real world. Hahahahaha.

Nonetheless, it provides a good escape. Jane's a nice female character and I find her drive, enthusiasm and positivity as awesome traits to aspire to. She's (Gina Rodriguez) probably the first actress I started to follow on Instagram and it's cool how you can do that now with celebrities you like, and you get to see them "behind the scenes" and what they do outside the show (darn, that statement makes me feel so old!)

But it's so true, how media and access to information is so different now. Because I of course googled the rich (hot) guy on the show, and learned that the actor is Justin Baldoni, and he was apparently more of a filmmaker than an actor before Jane the Virgin, and that he had this wedding proposal video to his girlfriend that went viral a few years back, and that we share the exact same birth date (YEP, down to the year boys and girls!), and he follows the Bahai faith. And now I'm googling about the Bahai faith, and again I'm learning something new outside the world of Christianity that I was fully brought up in...

So if good role models, open-mindedness, honest conversations and feel-good-vibes are the measure, I'd put Jane the Virgin up there with my favorite TV shows.

And Jane, come on, JUST MARRY RAFAEL!!!!!!! (Sorry, we're just on Season 01, Episode 16).


Saturday, September 27, 2014

Fairness vs. Generosity

As I was driving home, thinking about the work week that has passed, I could almost hear my dear friend asking me in about a week’s time: “How did Jesus speak to you recently?”

Well I do feel that God spoke to me recently, last Saturday, during the anticipated mass. The day’s gospel was about The Parable of the Workers in the Vineyard (Matthew 20:1-16). It will sound lame, but I did empathize with the disgruntled workers, because I’m such a square and self-righteous person myself, always chasing after what is “fair” and “equal”, or even “equitable”.

But the priest impressed upon me how indeed the gospel was not about being fair, but about how the Lord is so very kind and generous in how he gives. And how we, too, should not be so obsessed about getting the right slice of the pie, but to simply be grateful that we have any pie to eat at all.

The gospel hit me not as the pie-eater, but as the pie-slicer (or baker, however you wanna view it). As a boss, I’m very particular about giving employees what is exactly due to them, and extra careful not to give too much to any one, for fear of being seen by others as “unfair” or having favorites. Worse, I realized that I oftentimes hold back giving, for fear that the act of generosity or kindness will be misinterpreted as a “company standard”, or set a precedent for similar scenarios in the future.

My mom, on the other hand, is a complete opposite. She gives without asking. She shares her time, her knowledge, and whatever treasures she has. She gives until there is hardly any left for her. Sometimes, there is really nothing left for her at all.

It’s just so unfortunate how her generosity has been abused, and now she is jaded and even more cautious than me when it comes to giving.

So Jesus spoke to me that day, and reminded me not to give a sh*t what other people think when I feel like giving. The world is too full of evil to have anyone put kindness on hold. There’s too much to be afraid of, to worry and cry about, to run and break down from, for anyone to edit-out generosity. I see the sadness everywhere I go. I am witness to the insecurities people have, resulting from a shortness of love and compassion. And with so much pain in this world, how will I be able to live with myself if I don’t exert any effort in trying to at least scrape off some of this pain?

I realized I must not limit the love I give away. If others feel that there is a limit to the compassion and understanding that we give to people who seem so undeserving of such love, then I’ll let that be their stand.

Meanwhile, I have a heart and hands of my own, and I am free to use them however I want.

Capping off with this Natalie Merchant song that never fails to overwhelm me with gratitude.


Sunday, July 20, 2014

At Peace

Just finished watching 'Dawn of the Planet of the Apes', and I must say, I was pleasantly surprised that I enjoyed it. I find that its story strikes at the heart of many conflicts we have today -- conflicts big and small; amongst families, friends, neighbors, organizations, businesses, countries, races -- whatever groups of people you can think of!

With the Palestenian-Israeli conflict running for decades, plus the recent tragedy of a civilian airline being shot down with its 295 innocent passengers, conflict has become THE theme that has cut through time and territory. And if one is not properly armed, it's so easy to fall into a state of depression because of how hopeless the world has become.

With so many sad news around us, in one of my pray dates, I shared about how I am sometimes overcome with guilt that I am not "affected enough" by such state of affairs.

Okay, forget about society's current events; even for issues that are closer to home, I would catch myself feeling guilty that I can go through my daily responsibilities feeling mostly at peace, hardly harassed or kept up at night.

Meanwhile, I would observe other people becoming high-strung and stressed by related issues and experiences.

I would ask myself: Am I insensitive and inconsiderate? Why am I at peace when the people around me are not? Are they seeing something I'm not? Am I apathetic or blind to the troubles that are right in front of me? Is there something wrong with me? 

This verse offered me both comfort and humility:

Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God.  And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.
Philippians 4:6-7 NIV

Comfort because I did not need to understand everything that He does, as His thoughts are at a higher level than my own. Humility because while I claim to "not be affected" by things that I'm going through, I was obliviously worrying about WHY I was not worried, which is anxiety in itself.

The conclusion? Well, something that was emphasized to me again today, is to focus on things that are within my control, and to not worry about those that are beyond my control. Why allow my energy be depleted if I sincerely believe that He is sovereign?

And taking the cue from Caesar, we realistically cannot control the people around us, even if we are of the same race...even if we are "family". What's important is how we relate to EACH human / animal we come across, whether family or not. That we treat this person with love, offer trust, show respect -- because that's the only thing that matters in the end. Not our power or influence, but how much love we give away.

Monday, June 2, 2014

It Is Simple Just Being...FREE!

We all have our reasons for why we love different stuff, but here's why I love concerts:

Because for approximately two hours, I get completely lost in the vibrations and lyrics and lights. For the price of a concert ticket, I am permitted to throw all caution to the hazy wind and jump as much as I want and scream my lungs out even if I sing out of key. It's videoke at a national anthem level (I am Pinoy after all), singing alongside kindred spirits, and for those two hours, there is no war, just peace, love, and an unspoken understanding that we are all here to have a good time -- and respect each other for it.

I'm only grateful that I was able to experience this on one unlikely evening in April, eighteen years after I experienced the same high with the same band.

I describe it as "unlikely" because there was nothing special about April at all.

First of all, like I said, this band's last gig in the country was eighteen years ago, so who would have anticipated that they would be in Manila that month? Secondly, I had been in some sort of concert drought, not having watched anything in a looooong time for various reasons, though one can easily blame how "life" and "priorities" have changed. Thirdly, due to the gig's de-prioritization in my supposedly-mature adult life, me and my supposed-concert date -- my best friend (let's call her Stevie) who I watched the concert with when we were 13 years old -- ended up buying a different concert ticket date from mine, so it wasn't exactly the ideal reunion scenario I had in mind.

Fast forward to April 8, Stevie watches the first gig and gives me a blow-by-blow SMS update pre-show. The concert starts and she's silent. The concert ends, and she just says, "No words."

Fast forward again to April 11. There were three bands to do the front act but we only entered when the third band was playing. The place was overly packed, people seemed pre-occupied with booze and cocktails; simply not the concert vibe that I know. Meanwhile, I counted down until M&C was up...

And then it started. Those butterflies as the band steps onto the stage. Those goosebumps that go with realizing that something you've wanted for so long is just within your grasp, and within seconds of unfolding right before your eyes. At ang pinaka nakaka kilig sa lahat -- the first strum, the first bass pluck, the first drumbeat, or the first echo. In this case, it was the drum intro to "Sundays".

Listen to how "Sundays" starts off and see what I mean! 
(Better yet, listen to the whole track and weep with me)


Immediately I understood why Stevie fell "silent" on her text messages to me.

From that moment, I time warped to when I was thirteen years old. I shocked myself that I still memorized most if not all of the lines from each song in the Lucky Dumpling album, and even Polyester from 12 Songs. I jumped up and down and up and down with a leather bag on my shoulder the whole time. I laughed at myself for forgetting that I'm NOT supposed to bring a bag to a concert! I shrieked and hooted and cheered at every chance, as if each additional decibel would yield a higher percentage chance of the band doing another gig in the next 24 hours. Oh, and did I say that I jumped up and down and up and down???

While each song seemed to carry an unexplained significance, my favorites for the night were "Koo Koo Koo", "Crazy Old World" and "Traveling Song".

Thinking more about it now, it was very liberating to sing-along to Koo Koo Koo's lines, which now strikes me as a very confident and cheerful way of saying "I'm my own self and I'm quirky and imperfect and I don't need to be like you and I'm aye-okay!" Slowing down to "Crazy Old World" in the middle of the super-energized night was an overwhelming reminder of how beautiful life and earth is, and to never forget to give due credit to its Creator. And "Traveling Song"? Can I just say I went crazy to how the band kept us hanging to the extended "I believeeeee..." and guitar strums so that we would go crazier once we all hit the chorus together: "...It is simple just being...FREE! Eeyow-eeyow-eeyow-ee-yee-ee-yow!"

There's no way possible I could recap the happiness of the night with mere words. Let me try to share my joy through some photos from camera phones ("unlikely" night, remember?) Much thanks to my sister for taking the pics and the whole group for waiting on me as I fan-girled after the gig. :)

Eeeeek, my view is blocked by camera phones!

Aaaaahhhhh finally, thank God, I see the guys :)

Stealing a shot of Jay-jay through all those videographers

Gugut! He looks much different without the long hair of the Lucky Dumpling photos ;)

Here we go!! Proudly showing off my memorabilia shirt from their 1997 concert.
They look amused, yiheeee!!!

My double-signed shirt! Bought and signed at the front and back in 1997;
signed again in 2014!

Check out my wide-eyed kilig smile even though no one is looking (yet)

Take two! Much better. HAPPINESS!!!

Let me go back to Sundays as I close this post. :)

I've lost once before / I'm older now
Sometimes I cannot remember / Sometimes I cannot forget how
I've lost once before / I'm older now
But sometimes I forget my age
Is there a yearning inside / that keeps the spirit free
Is there a yearning inside / that reminds us we'll succeed
- Sundays / Moonpools & Caterpillars

*****

If you got curious about Moonpools & Caterpillars from all my gushing, check out my favorite coverage of their recent visit:



Thursday, April 17, 2014

Bucketlist

In no particular order:
  1. Turkey
  2. Spain
  3. France
  4. Brazil
  5. Italy
  6. Japan
  7. Austria
  8. Switzerland
  9. Greece
  10. Russia
  11. Laos
  12. Cambodia
  13. Vietnam
  14. Kinabalu
  15. UK
  16. Nepal
  17. Grand Canyon
  18. Yosemite
  19. big-wall climbing
  20. ice climbing
  21. cross-country biking
  22. skydiving
  23. high-lining
  24. bungee-jumping
  25. diving
  26. ride a helicopter
  27. travel on a hot air balloon
  28. swim with dolphins
  29. river paddling
  30. jump off a waterfall
  31. jump-back and jump-through
  32. press handstand
  33. levers
  34. one-arm pull-ups
  35. 8a and V12 (to start with...)
  36. giant rollercoasters
  37. multi-day music festivals
  38. meet DMB, KOL, Foo Fighters
  39. watch the Olympics
  40. join the Olympics
  41. West-End
  42. Broadway
  43. play the piano again
  44. aurora borealis
  45. geysers
  46. Pompeii
  47. the Amazon Rainforest
  48. Serengeti
  49. Machu Pichu
  50. Ancient Egypt
  51. Terra Cotta Warriors
  52. Parthenon
  53. Easter Island
  54. write a poem
  55. be a magazine editor
  56. get a book published
  57. get paid for writing
  58. or traveling
  59. or both
  60. start my own publishing firm
  61. build a public library
  62. give away books to kids who can't afford books
  63. inspire kids to love books
  64. teach kids how to read and write
  65. Mt. Everest
  66. Mt. Kilimanjaro
  67. Mt. Pulag
  68. Mt. Guiting-guiting
  69. Mt. Kanlaon

All this under 15 minutes. Let me stop here before I never do. They say we should dream big, right?

***Inspired by a photo of Turkey's Cappadocia that a friend posted. How worked up I can get by a single image!!!

P.S. I can't believe I forgot to include meeting all my sports idols and watching all the international sports events. That's probably plus ten items in itself, at the very least.

Thursday, February 20, 2014

Lately...


...I been, I been losing sleep
Dreaming about the things that we could be
But baby, I been, I been prayin' hard
Said no more counting dollars
We'll be counting stars
Yeah, we'll be counting stars

Not a fan of One Republic. Not now, never have been. I always found 'Apologize' overly dramatic, and their live performances plain mediocre. Their tunes are catchy, I won't contest that. But I could never reconcile the emo appeal of their songs with their unpolished, ragged image; it just didn't seem to match, and for me, felt so contrived.

But this particular song grew on me. 'Counting Stars' wasn't a love-at-first-sound, and took a few listens before I caught myself singing along to it. Fast forward to today (about four months later -- I won't deny I was late to pick it up), I find myself paying more attention to the words and just re-playing the songs on YouTube. Even funnier (or lamer, or geekier, depending on how you wanna view it), I Googled for "song meanings" to see if any other people assessed the lyrics, and lo and behold, it had a plethora of interpretations.

I guess, with lyrics like these, one is just given all the stimulus and liberty to infer meaning.

I feel something so right
By doing the wrong thing
And I feel something so wrong
By doing the right thing
I couldn't lie, couldn't lie, couldn't lie
Everything that kills me makes me feel alive


Aren't you just urged to read between the lines? ;)