At Peace

Just finished watching 'Dawn of the Planet of the Apes', and I must say, I was pleasantly surprised that I enjoyed it. I find that its story strikes at the heart of many conflicts we have today -- conflicts big and small; amongst families, friends, neighbors, organizations, businesses, countries, races -- whatever groups of people you can think of!

With the Palestenian-Israeli conflict running for decades, plus the recent tragedy of a civilian airline being shot down with its 295 innocent passengers, conflict has become THE theme that has cut through time and territory. And if one is not properly armed, it's so easy to fall into a state of depression because of how hopeless the world has become.

With so many sad news around us, in one of my pray dates, I shared about how I am sometimes overcome with guilt that I am not "affected enough" by such state of affairs.

Okay, forget about society's current events; even for issues that are closer to home, I would catch myself feeling guilty that I can go through my daily responsibilities feeling mostly at peace, hardly harassed or kept up at night.

Meanwhile, I would observe other people becoming high-strung and stressed by related issues and experiences.

I would ask myself: Am I insensitive and inconsiderate? Why am I at peace when the people around me are not? Are they seeing something I'm not? Am I apathetic or blind to the troubles that are right in front of me? Is there something wrong with me? 

This verse offered me both comfort and humility:

Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God.  And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.

Philippians 4:6-7 NIV

Comfort because I did not need to understand everything that He does, as His thoughts are at a higher level than my own. Humility because while I claim to "not be affected" by things that I'm going through, I was obliviously worrying about WHY I was not worried, which is anxiety in itself.

The conclusion? Well, something that was emphasized to me again today, is to focus on things that are within my control, and to not worry about those that are beyond my control. Why allow my energy be depleted if I sincerely believe that He is sovereign?

And taking the cue from Caesar, we realistically cannot control the people around us, even if we are of the same race...even if we are "family". What's important is how we relate to EACH human / animal we come across, whether family or not. That we treat this person with love, offer trust, show respect -- because that's the only thing that matters in the end. Not our power or influence, but how much love we give away.

self-censorship

i fear i do this too often.

this may be one reason why the blog posts seldom come, because i choose not to write about "mundane" things, in worry that people may not be able to relate, or appreciate, or just get plain bored with whatever i write about!

the same holds true for the spoken word, and i often catch myself filtering my own thoughts for no apparent reason. (i say no "apparent" reason because Lord knows there IS a real reason -- it just isn't apparent to me, because it's probably some deep-rooted trauma stemming from my childhood, that has manifested into a habit of self-censorship that only psychology can explain).

so in an attempt to be a tad bit more open, voila, i talk about my tendency to self-censor.

***

in other news, life has been good. God has been good. i've been showered with many small miracles that i almost passed off as everyday things, no thanks to my exteeeeeeeme focus on less-important matters (tunnel vision sucks). i can't say i'm out of the tunnel, but there is light. huwag lang sana akong madapa, masakit 'yon.

hooray for my intact optimism. :-)

about today

a day made complete by...

1. time spent with mom, dad, ate, kuya, trina, kala, kayin, and loula

2. pitching in for a few hours at the cafe

3. a few precious hours with miel, who was away for three days

4. and a relaxed time watching the first episode of glee season 2 and 'funny people' on hbo

#1 and #4 are rare, which make them a real treat.

having all four happen in one day makes it awesome.

wasn't even planning to watch tv tonight, and i'm so glad to have caught nice shows. though i don't know if 'funny people' left me happy....it kinda left me with mixed emotions and things to think about :-/

but still, there's much to smile for. good night!

flashback

i would go there around 4pm, after class. i would assist in opening the door, welcoming guests, giving them a smile while saying, "sandali lang po!" 

i would lead them to their seats, hand them menus, and help traffic more people who would come pouring in in big, then small, then big waves again.

when the halls would get a bit too crowded, i would station myself behind the cake counter, taking orders, either putting the slices on the small oval plate, or in a take-out box. as the coffee machine worked, i would carefully place one piece of spritsar cookie, a packet of sugar and cream, and a teaspoon over a saucer, before completing the order with its cup of freshly brewed coffee.

i had also memorized the menu by then, which enabled me to write corresponding prices in guests' order slips without using a cheat sheet. one thing that hasn't changed, though, is my poor arithmetic; i was heavily dependent on the calculator, which i clicked on with confidence and ease. (must have something to do with my piano-playing that rouses me with keypad-related activities, haha). even more with the heavier keys of the cash register. 

i loved the pace of those evenings. i probably didn't think of it this way back then, but i guess i already loved being useful and productive. 

fast forward to thirteen years later, and i'm re-acquainted with this particular joy of being in our cafe dining room. the rush of people who are ever-so-patient with the waitlist, the unbelievable amount of food that comes out of the kitchen, the seemingly-synchronized movement of the servers, and the constant, joyful buzz in the air...i swear, i almost forgot i had experienced it before.

but here i am again, and i'm happy to be reunited with these sensations. 

this time, i know i will never again forget.

muni-muni

tinamaan ako ng katamaran ngayong araw. magka-climb dapat ako, pero pinili kong bumalandra sa sofa ng nanay ko para humabol sa "uninterrupted sleep" na tatlong gabi ko ng ninanamnam. 

gabi-gabi ko kasing inaasam na makakuha ng 10 oras na tulog...at sa nakaraang dalawang linggo -- kung saan bumisita ako sa mga lungsod ng cagayan de oro, butuan, at general santos -- panay 5 oras na tulog lang ang nakukuha ko. 

kaya siguro ako hinila ng sofa ngayong araw. sabi ng katawan ko, "ayan, bawiin mo na ang sampung oras na pinapangarap mo!"

pero tila hindi ko pa rin nakamit ang pangarap na ito, dahil kahit gusto ng katawan kong humiga, ang utak ko naman ay tuluyang nagiisip, nagtitimbang, nagmumuni-muni. 

HAY.

ngunit sa kabila ng pagkabigo, kung tutuusin, gumaan din ang loob ko sa lahat ng planong nabuo habang ako'y nakahiga at nakatitig sa kisame. kasi, sa di-karaniwang pagkakataon, pinabayaan ko din ang sarili ko na managinip ng gising. mula sa mga personal na pangarap, hanggang sa mga pangarap ko para sa aking pamilya. kahit pambihira, hinayaan ko ang utak ko na lumipad.

sabi nga nila, DREAM BIG. kaya ayun, nanaginip ako. ng marami. ngayon, ang problema na lang ay kung papaano sila gagawing totoo. buti na lang, mahilig ako sa goal-setting. 

uumpisahan ko sa training regimen ngayong linggo.....and all the rest will follow. ;-)

up in the air

been intending to blog but haven't found the energy to gather all the happenings, memories and thoughts into a written piece of work. and now, the sheer amount of it all just makes the task even more daunting. it is so daunting that i feel it merits a quick post about just how daunting it is!

right now, i'm in a state of: relief. fatigue. anxiety. excitement. and contentment. all at the same time. (perhaps that qualifies insanity, too?)

so why 'up in the air'? 

because for one, i've literally been travelling/flying around the country for our negosyo seminars (and yes, some excursions). second, i am once again reflecting on my future whereabouts (work-wise). and third, i've been so physically taxed out that it feels like my mind is constantly floating, much like a 24/7 beer buzz.

so i'm SUPER thankful for this day at home, to rest, work a little, and rest some more. but as usual, rest never seems to be enough for me. so for now, it's time to doze off....

i will blog again. some day soon, i hope!

think positib, walang aayaw!

my blog is my grateful journal :-)

1. goodbye puerto prinsesa; hello albay and tuguegarao!

2. steady, focused climbing, made possible by a gradually-recovering shoulder

3. gradually-recovering shoulder, made possible by a disciplined stretching and strengthening regimen (proud!)

4. my first 13k, accomplished spontaneously on one weekday evening. and my knee didn't bust!

5. happier loula, made possible by a gradually-recovering knee (left hind leg, from ACL surgery) and dislocated hip (right hind leg)

6. an intact boyfriend

7. broadway + disney soundtrack downloads: phantom of the opera, miss saigon, beauty & the beast, aladdin

8. thirteen years of chocolate kiss. join the celebration with our birthday dessert buffet and jam session this friday, feb 26, 6-9pm at the UP cafe!!!

good night!

the ticklist

• laid-back skate fun: CHECK! 
• car trunk buffet of bihon, lumpiang shanghai and egg pan de sal: CHECK! 
• exercise ball from eika: CHECK!
• sewing kit from mitzi: CHECK!
• get out of bed at 4:45 am: CHECK!
• hot lugaw in cold montalban morning: CHECK!
• cold (by my standards) climbing weather: CHECK!
• roman holiday: CHECK CHECK!
• sun on my skin...even just a little bit: CHECK!
• shoulder exercises using makeshift weights: CHECK!
• loacker quadratinis: CHECK!
• quality time with loula: CHECK!
• mahimbing na siesta (kasi ang aga gumising): CHECK!
• good news from hk: CHECK!
• mom's stuffed pork chops and mashed potatoes: CHECK!
• reply sa mga nag-greet sa akin: CHECK!

good night!!! twas a fulfilling day. :-) 

sa lahat ng bumati, salamat ulit.

Me on Roman Holiday (V5), Wawa, Montalban

*Photo credit: Dennis Diaz (thanks for Sunday sessions! more more more!)

ready for 2010

my holiday season was quiet, but i'm happy with just how relaxing it was. i loved the pace of each day. while miel worried about not knowing what to do with all the free time, i had no trouble at all filling them up with the things i loved to:

1. sleep - i got a good dose of sleep, the way i wanted it. long, uninterrupted, with no alarm clock to cut it short. and though i always insist that ten straight hours is my ideal sleeping time (and something i aspire for every weekend!), i never got it...nonetheless, felt satisfied with getting eight hours on some days. maybe because i only got out of bed to have breakfast/brunch, then returned to get 1-2 hours siesta.
   
2. eat - and i refer to the once-a-year christmas feasts that my mom so lovingly prepares. her morcon, pastel, embotido, chicken relleno, chinese ham, egg pan de sal + butter + more butter, canonigo...plus a few non-regular fares of steamed lapu-lapu and stuffed roast chicken. 
3. spend late night outs with friends - mix of planned and unplanned, with old friends and new acquaintances, with little or lots of alcohol, but always filled with good fun. whether it was a simple home-made dinner or a loud boys vs girls rock band contest, it packed my senses with things i never knew they've been missing so badly.
4. work out - i ran, and ran, and skated, and climbed. OHHHHH, YES!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! this one i knew i've been missing very badly, and after stuffing myself with all the good food, nothing feels more satisfying than sweating profusely and waking up all those sleeping muscles. thank you, UP, for welcoming the lone runner. thank you miel for always keeping those boards in the trunk. thank you, power-up for, well, being power-up.
5. be updated with friends' lives and see how much they're enjoying - i know. ang cheesy, even for my taste. pasensya na. but over the holidays, i was able to check my facebook and multiply accounts more frequently, and was moved to see how people were getting to do the things they loved to do over the break. friends were reunited, families bonded. some welcomed the new year up in cold, peaceful sagada, or by spending much-needed family quality time in the province, or by having a deep water solo adventure, or by going on a surfing road trip. oh, and one gave birth to a beautiful baby girl! 

so thanks for this rejuvenating holiday break, and to 2010: let's get it on!

another failed attempt on sleeping early

i was home early last night. i was eating dinner (out) by 9:15, and home by 10:00. 

and just as i looked forward to some actual waking minutes with the family, i find that the house lights are all still out: the family was not yet home ;-)

the intention was to sleep early, before midnight, but again i failed myself. i blame two things: 

1) loula

loula was home alone the whole day, so to make up for her loneliness, i spent about 10 minutes playing fetch, and another 10 resting with her in the 3rd floor sofa (me sitting, her lying down with head on my lap). afterwards, i had to start getting ready for bed so i let her just sleep some more, alternating sleeping positions on the couch and wooden floor.

2) glee

for a change, i turned on the TV and played the glee DVD episodes 1-8 that kristine gave me many weeks ago. i was already somewhere on episode 5, and i thought i'd play it while i took a bath -- just to at least listen to the singing. of course, once i hit play, i couldn't peel my eyes off the screen and ended up having my shower at 12:45am. my dad watched with me as he caught the last episode of the disc.

3) loula again

1am and i finally decided to hit the sack. i was already tucked into my bed when i hear the gates open. knowing how adorably loula can behave once she's sensed that my mom is home, i pull myself out of the bed just to witness her reaction. and indeed, the sound of my mom's voice as she entered the door makes loula jump to her feet and run, as if she wasn't sound asleep 1 minute ago.

i say hello, good night, and go to bed five minutes later.

lucky me!

"with all that i've done wrong, i must've done something right"

- from the song butterfly kisses* by bob carlisle

1. got sent to india last may for work-related training. and got to visit taj mahal. (my own set of photos still yet to be uploaded, though! linking you to robbie and pamy's first...)

2. received two cool job offers: bayan-anihan and philippine center for entrepreneurship. 

3. am a GRIP alumni -- with full access to all parties. haha! thanks, guys. :D

4. met these strong and fun climbers in yangshuo, who turned out to be sponsored athletes. one was also a photographer, who took my photo and was able to use it for PATAGONIA!!!! (i'm the one in red beside the butterfly!!!! i was so psyched when i found out about this!)

6. given a slot for an upcoming event by the chinese mountaineering association. i'll be off to huguan province, china on Thursday!

7. know a reliable travel agent. rina is the best!!!

8. have a mom who founded chocolate kiss. she went on a vacation over the weekend, so last Friday, i had to receive -- on her behalf, along with Minette our UP branch manager -- an award given by the QC government for being part of the Top Ten Restaurant Trendsetters in Quezon City. this was one of the activities in the QC-na event. grabe, sobrang nakakataba ng puso!!!

9. loved by loula, our family golden retriever. kahit na hindi ako ang pack leader ;) 

10. take part in a beautiful, meaningful wedding. congratulations to my friends nina and yuklid :-) super happy for you guys.

there are more, but if i list them all, this will never end!!! :-D

*super sappy song, but this particular line struck me and has always been tucked away in my mind...

Update - 26 Aug: Photos! Credits: #1 - Robbie's Facebook; #4 - Patagonia website; #10 - Jayjay Lucas

Update - 5 Sept: Photos to China climbing event are up!

hope floats

the title isn't all that fitting, but the movie title just popped into my head. it's really a general feeling of optimism that's kicking in, and the word HOPE was the first thing that came into mind. 

after a climbing / bouldering / stretching-slash-yoga session at TS, i was doing my usual arm-circling exercise to find that i wasn't feeling any pain in my left shoulder. it just sent a huge grin to my face and i couldn't help but jump (two times!!!!) in delight!!! hooray!!!! i'm sure it's not yet in 100% great shape, but it's a progression, right?!? i'm totally keeping my fingers and toes crossed that my rehabilitative approach is working....climbing light, static, making sure that my left shoulder gets a mild burnt feeling after each session (to make sure it got a fair share of work out), do some therapy exercises if the warm feeling isn't there, stretch before and after climbing, get enough rest.....it's probably been about four weeks of doing this already....so i'm hoping it's actually taking effect!!!!

then later on, while sitting on the toilet (sa bahay na 'to ha, hindi na sa TS!), i caught sight of my toes, all dried and calloused. of course, i ended up peeling the whites off, and smiled in all insane-solitary-glory for being so perked up by dry skin on my unwashed feet. 

there is more to come :)

*Photo courtesy of Mikey Schafer

thinking ahead vs. counting down

another case of glass half-full and half-empty. is this a good thing or a bad thing?

i realized that i automatically keep track of….

…number of minutes from office to buendia mrt, from buendia to east ave, from east ave to home
…number of minutes saved if I eat dinner in the car
…number of hours of sleep left if I sleep by this time
…number of tasks that need to be done before i call it a day
…number of tasks that i will not get to do for the day, and have to wait til tomorrow
…number of tasks i will still not get to do tomorrow, and have to wait til next week
…number of red flags in my mail server
…number of calls to be made
…number of nights left til the next presentation
…number of days left til the next paycheck
…number of weeks til the next vacation leave / long weekend

sigh. whatever happened to “it’s about the journey, not the destination?”

Eye openers from the Australian Open

Watching another Federer-Nadal match made me realize something: I'm predisposed to root for the underdog.

Ever since Nadal started becoming a threat to the Swiss champion, I've always cheered Nadal on, wanting him SO much to win simply because I wanted to see someone new on top. Federer has been breezing through the tournaments, majors

 or not, and it would've been just refreshing to find someone else to receive the first prize. And I couldn't see anyone else more deserving of that glorious position than Nadal, given his improving performance match after match, year after year. He deserved to win with all his hard work!!!

But since Roger's loss on grass last year, the tables ha

ve turned. And in this Australian Open, I was whispering my prayers for Roger.

...

So it was another dramatic Federer-Nadal final.

I wouldn't say it was as epic as their Wimbledon encounter (none of those stupid rain delays!), but just as amazing nonetheless, simply because the

y are possibly the only two who can endure the long

est rallies and conjure the most out-of-this-world winners at the same time! And what made it quite a show was really the suspense, because you could never say who would seal each set. First set pa lang, they broke each other twice! Roger's serves kept giving him aces -- on the other hand, he had lots of double faults and missed f

irst serves as well! There were moments when Rafa's groundstrokes would consistently be long, causing him to lose point after point...only to find that Roger would later commit even more unforced errors.

Though the thought had been scratching at the back of my mind since Roger's loss in the 3rd set tiebreak, it was really only in the last set when I

 finally recognized it and started to lose hope. Roger was just really unable to win the crucial points. He had A LOT of chances to break Nadal in the games leading up to the tiebreak, but Rafa was just relentless. Roger was superb in mixing up the shots and the plays -- and executed them really well! -- but Rafa always had that extra energy to run and hit back, much to Roger's surprise almost every time!

I was still hoping and praying in the final set...cou

nt on me to not give up...but what can I say? It seems the pressure has caught up Federer. And  it was such a sorry sight. From the moment of loss to the awarding ceremony where he literally choked up and cried, I couldn't help but shed a few tears as well. I love Rafa and admire his discipline and still-accumulating-skill and believe that he deserves this win, but I can't help but feel deep sympathy for Roger.

Like I said, I'm predisposed to root for the under

dog. So even if the Greatest Players Of  All Time were putting their bets behind Federer on this match, I've always felt that the mental/emotional battle is always the toughest, which was why I saw him as the one with the bigger disadvantage. Nadal had all the reason to be confident and empowered -- he had been winning all his recent matches and swimming in great reviews. Federer, on the other hand, had been struggling to reach the final rounds. Add to that the various pressures...Internally, he's af

ter the 14th grand slam title to tie Pete Sampras' record; he used to dominate Nadal on the hard court surface; he'd like to redeem himself in the same tournament where he first one a major grand slam. Externally, people can't pick any better opportunity for Federer to rise to the challenge given Nadal's "disadvantage" of being tired from the Verdasco semi-final, and Nadal's first time in the Australian Open finals.

It was hard not to feel for Roger. Especially sinc

e he is such a distinguished, calm man, never flinching in his game and interviews, no matter how daunting the challenges are. But I guess we all have are moments of weakness. When we can no longer pretend to be strong and together. And in times like these, we just have to let the moment be, and allow the people around us to comfort us and share their strength. Like Rafa so graciously and humbly said, "I really know how you feel. But remember -- you are one of the best players of the history and you

 are going to improve the 14 of Sampras. It is always a pleasue to play you and best of luck for the rest of the year."

Now, it is just a matter of Roger believing in himself as much as others believe in him. Maybe, hopefully, that will make all the difference.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

*Photos from http://www.australianopen.com/en_AU/index.html

there's always a first for everything

my family and i are spending Christmas at The Tagaytay Highlands Spa. went up here yesterday, Dec 24, and going back home tomorrow. mainly my mom wanted to get away from doing all the Christmas prep work (cooking, cooking and more cooking, to be followed by house-cleaning, house-cleaning and more house-cleaning). but at the same time, the whole family is also eager to just have a relaxing holiday, complete with free, fancy massage at the Highlands Spa -- this is Merry Christmas to us!

so yes, it's probably a first to spend Noche Buena without our traditional feast of...

- quezo de bola

- chinese ham

- embotido

- roast chicken/turkey

- pastel de lengua

- merced's egg pan de sal

- flowing chilled wine

and it's a first to have, in lieu of the above dishes, a mishmash of items such as....

- american ham

- blue cheese

- room-temp red wine

- skittles

- hershey's dark chocolate bars

- krispy kreme

....all because that's all we remembered to bring: junk food! haha!

i guess it's also a first to not be opening ANY gift on Christmas Eve. not that I open a lot, but all our lives we've been opening presents around the Christmas tree at the stroke of midnight. I intended on bringing at least a few to open even while we hang out in the hotel room, but totally forgot amidst the rush to leave the house as well :) 

it's also my first to be blogging outside of work or home! thanks to my brother's laptop and the available wifi in my mom's room.

well, just to cut to the chase, it's a refreshing experience to spend Christmas in a different way. i wouldn't dare say it's not special, because it's quite the opposite. it's probably even more special because it's so pure -- just me and the company of my family, all five of us + my grandmother -- enjoying each passing minute together inside the room, wearing pajamas and watching TV! no fancy gifts, no extravagant food.....just a luxurious setting of a hotel and expensive massages, hahaha.....but really, i haven't experienced Christmas any simpler than this. but it's cool, it's fun, it's rejuvenating, and it makes me feel more blessed than ever.

so before the day expires....MERRY CHRISTMAS TO ALL!

bawal magkasakit

maraming rason kung bakit. isa, mahirap maghabol sa trabaho. actually, hindi lang sa trabaho naghahabol -- sa lahat ng workout, training, at pati na din sa social obligations. pangalawa, mahal ang gamot (thanks, clusivol). pangatlo, nagiging unproductive lang talaga ang tao.

pero para sa akin, isa pang malaking dahilan kung bakit ayokong-ayokong magkasakit ay dahil ang PANGIT ng lasa ng gamot. aaminin ko, para akong bata. kelangan ng isang basong tubig para sa isang capsule. kelangan ng mental preparation. kelangan ng appetizer at chaser.

hay, bawal magkasakit.

unsolved mysteries

1. feb 26. my father comes home with a looooong dent along the passenger side of his car. black scratches running from the front door handle to the trunk. mom asks what happened. dad says he was "only running at 50" when a car backing out of a parking slot hits him. he didn't mention being at fault, or running too fast for his (and other drivers') own good. no mention of the probabiliy of being too blind-eyed to his surroudings. but being an eyewitness to his lapses in spotting oncoming vehicles (in at least five occasions, i should note), it makes me wonder just how complete the story is.
   
2. march 4. libis. 10:30 pm. miel and i are on our way home from our tuesday run at the fort when traffic slows down. we find a toppled over van -- lying on its right side, precisely parallel to the island, as if it was deliberately pushed over to be displayed on its side. No injured persons arounds, nor any other car that may have caused the accident; only police checking the vehicle out. how did he get into that position?? if it was running full speed and the driver jerked the wheel, wouldn't it have at least spun out and hit another car? how did it get into its perfectly aligned pose, scratch-free?
3. march 5. katipunan-C5 underpass. 11:15 pm. motorcycles zoom past as miel and i approach the flyover (northbound, turning from libis to katipunan). we drive leisurely as we listen to incubus' crow left of the murder. on the flyover, we take the left-most lane to go into the tunnel, and find a motorcyclist lying face down on the road: helmet off, his motorcycle about three meters ahead of him. only one motorcyclist backtracks to see what happened to the guy. miel stops at the side of the road. while i frantically call my mom to ask for an emergency number (117), miel steps out of the car to check the guy out, along with the other motorcyclist. miel returns to the car. the guy is still alive. while i continue attempting to reach the emergency hotline, passers-by slowing down at the scene stare hard at us, as if we caused the motorcyclist's accident. with my mom's permission, we leave the scene to escape the accusing glares. along katipunan, i am finally able to report the accident to mmda.
4. same night. while reporting the whole incident to mom over the celphone, she tells me that my brother is stuck on commonwealth avenue. tells me that he stopped to have dinner, but now the car won't start. miel and i stop over to accompany him until help arrives. my brother demonstrates the problem. turns the key, switches on the headlights, honks the horn -- shows the battery isn't discharged. but, turning the key further, wouldn't start the engine. so we wait until my dad and jake arrives and attach the jumper cables. the engine finally revs up. man on the street says it may be the alternator. hmmm.
5. still the same night. lying down on my bed, i give miel a call to say good night. i think about the day, the night, the past week, the past month, and realize how frequently miel and i see road accidents. i can't help but feel so thakful that we are spared of those incidents. that we are so blessed. i also couldn't help but ask...why?

quick escapes

snap-on, snap-off thoughts for preserving one's sanity. (more fittingly, MY sanity). one blink is all it takes, and hullo instant-sanctuary.

1. dolly parton's islands in the stream.
2. hitchin' a ride with *TOOOOOOT*. kiligggggg.
3. loula and shelby.
4. tama2 (the amazing race asia 2 -- the acronym alone weirds me out). marc&roveelson. ALLAN WU, his tight sandos, and extended pauses for more dramatic effect.
5. freshly-baked cookies from mrs. fields. mmMMMmmm.
6. neck-slicing ala manok-slaughtering c/o the demon barber of fleet street. i was giggling through the buthchering scenes...couldn't believe how morbid it was!!
7. link. troy. zac. he's the ladies' choice. haha.
8. kevin and senator mccallister's bro. kiligggggg.
9. charlie bit my finger + remix.
10. wine and beer.
11. tomorrow. the best is yet to come.

water-bearer or sea goat?

A break from the long posts. Came across this funny quiz on blogthings. I've always believed I was a true-blue Aquarian, but the results claim otherwise!

The quiz tests: WHAT SIGN SHOULD YOU BE?

My result: YOU SHOULD BE A CAPRICORN

What's good about you: hard working and ambitious, you're practically a guaranteed success (really now!)

What's bad about you: you can be unforgiving toward people who fail you (i want to deny this, but it may be in my subconscious, right?)

In love: you're very picky (i'd like to think i just have a well-defined preference), but extremely devoted to the one you choose

In friendship, you're: likely to be a good friend but expect a lot in return (hmmm...this is making me wonder...)

Your ideal job: rock climber (whoa!), sculptor, or practitioner of black magic

Your sense of fashion: preppy (hardly!!) and put together

You like to pig out on: meat and potatoes

*Words in parenthesis supplied by me. Was amused by those!

Get'cha head in the game

I just had to post this picture. (Yes, HSM is one of my guilty pleasures). Now onto the entry.

My mind’s been flying all around. Not in a scatterbrained type of way, but more of an inability to set my priorities. There’s just so many things I want to do, to focus on, to give my 100% to. I want to go all out on different things all at the same time, but the fact is, I can only give 100% of myself at a time, because there’s only one me!

Wanting to do so much is obviously doing me more harm than good. It’s debilitating me. It’s making my thoughts disorganized and my words incoherent. It sucks.

So in an effort to recognize what my priorities should be, I thought of writing about those things that have pumped my adrenaline, released my endorphins, or just simply made me whisper a word of thanks to the high heavens.

Expect the next series of posts to come from the optimistic, level-headed side of me.

Note:
Thank you, Patty, for encouraging me to write about the happy stuff.
Thanks, Miel, for reminding me how much a whiner I can be.